I Never Thought I Had A Problem
Over the past few months, I have been reading so much. I have been forced to look at myself, my mental health, and the ways I have self-sabotaged. To say I've been uncomfortable is in understatement. When you are forced to take a look at yourself and your habits, it can be a hard pill to swallow when you see all the ways you hurt yourself. And something I never even knew was happening was that I have been struggling with my mental health, yet would always be the first to say I never had a problem with that.
I made excuse after excuse, blamed everything and everyone else, and played the victim role without even seeing it, and kept myself in toxic patterns. The last part of 2024 forced me take a good, hard look at myself and the changes I would like to see moving forward. As much as it hurts, I've never been more grateful.
As per most New Year's, we set our intentions only to cave early on. How do we make them stick? One quote that has been on repeat for the past few days is, “Your new life will cost you your old one.” This has never felt more true. We see this in nature, as the caterpillar cocoons into a butterfly. We have to prioritize ourselves. We have to go inward. We have to make changes if that's what we feel we must do in order to fly.
January is a self-care month for me. As a people pleaser, I tend to prioritize others needs above my own, so much so it interferes with the work I want to get accomplished in all areas of my life. I am finally beginning to see the effects it has had on my emotional and mental health. This has caused me to go on a deep dive, learning as much as I possibly can to get out of this rut I've been in.
I just finished reading Atomic Habits by James Clear and The High Five Habit by Mel Robbins. Hell, I even bought The High Five Journal. I am part-way through Mel's new book, The Let Them Theory, and already have my next read lined up, Self-Help, by Gabrielle Bernstein.
The point is, I'm taking some time to prioritize my mental, emotional, spiritual and physical health and put my time and energy where my mouth is. Less talking. More being and doing the things I want for myself. If you are in the same boat, I highly recommend the books I just mentioned. I feel like I hear a voice of reason in my head for the first time in a long time.
I am so blessed every single day with the beauty that surrounds me and the amazing people in my life. I have so much to be grateful for. To my friends and family who have listened to the same things over and over again. To all my fans and readers who have done nothing but support and encourage me. To the hard lessons I've learned in 2024 and the biggest take away, that we cannot change other people or their opinions of us. I am so thankful.
If you need help on your journey as well, reach out. Growth often comes in the silence. It also comes in every moment we are able to make choices that support us being the best we can be. It's not a race. It's one baby step at a time.
Let's do this, 2025.
Thank you always for reading.
I love you.
It’s no secret you have an “Army” behind and around you, but you also have a “General” inside of yourself. You know the personal and public battlefields well. You know what you’ve conquered in the past. You’ve been there to support and bring relief to so many others, now it’s time for yourself. Like I said this year to you, “Be the book. Be YOUR book.” Be, “Unfuckwithable,” my dear friend.
Love you, and soldiers of support are standing by… 🙏🏼🖤🤘🏼
I love this. You always come through in the clutch. I’ve came to the realization that my sobriety and mental health need to be put 1st before everything. Even a job. I put in my 2 weeks at the place I was at because my well being is priority over a job that doesn’t appreciate what I do. 1 door closes another opens. This year is about what I have been wanting to do and I’m gna do all I can to get to the place I deserve to be. Thanks Lindsey you rock! 🤘🫶❤️