If It's Not a F*ck Yes ...

 

I hope you've all had a stellar week. I'm writing this from beautiful San Diego, so I'm going to keep this one a little shorter.

 

This week I posted a Worthy Wednesday video about a phrase I've been living my life by lately:

 

 

We often hear that the Universe gives us three answers: yes, no, or not yet. But for years, I spent time in something much more confusing than any of those. I spent years with someone who was simply… unsure about me.

 

And all of that “unsure” made me feel like I had something to prove.

 

I think I described it in my book like Donkey in Shrek yelling, “Pick me! Pick me!”

 

But the reality of living in someone else's uncertainty is that it creates panic. It creates the waiting, the trying harder, the people-pleasing, and the constant hope that clarity will eventually arrive if we just do enough to earn it.

 

The chase. It actually really sucks. It's no fun. Do not recommend. 0 stars. 

 

And here's the truth I had to learn the hard way and feel many of us do:

His uncertainty had absolutely nothing to do with my worth, even though that's exactly what I believed at the time.

 

But those dynamics create patterns. And eventually I had to face the fact that I was the only one who could break them.

 

If I could go back and tell my younger self one thing, it would simply be this:

 

 

Not everything needs to happen right now. Not every connection needs to become something immediately. 

 

In fact, they rarely do when you're with the wrong people. 

Instead, it will just become a cycle. 

 

And if we're honest with ourselves, we usually know deep down when something doesn't feel right. All of it. 

 

Flow doesn't happen when we're in a hurry. Alignment doesn't happen when we want what we want yesterday.

The magic is often in the slowdown.

 

For a long time I rushed toward things I thought I wanted - things that, in hindsight, were never really meant for me in the first place.

 

Have you ever felt that way?

 

Now that I've stepped into what I jokingly and joyfully call “fuck yes energy,” I'm noticing something interesting. It's not loud or dramatic. It's actually quite peaceful.

 

The people, opportunities, and conversations showing up around me feel aligned. And I've realized I don't want anyone in my life who isn't bringing that same clarity.

 

That applies to friendships.
It applies to my work with clients.
And yes, it definitely applies to relationships.

 

Because the right things in your life won't require you to convince them - or yourself - that they're right.

 

There will be a flow.
There will be a comfort.
There will be a clarity that doesn't require chasing.

 

So here's to a weekend full of clarity, peace.. and a whole lot of fuck yeses.