Presence is the Best Present

We’ve been talking about showing up for the past few weeks and I think something that we should talk about is the difference between physical presence and emotional presence.

I was talking to a good friend the other day and the conversation turned to phone usage and the strains it can have on relationships. There is a HUGE difference between being physically present and emotionally present. And this is not just about others. This is also about ourselves. I touched on spending time with yourself last week and the importance of getting to truly know yourself. But how can we truly show up for ourselves and others when we are constantly staring at a screen?

My guy and I went out to dinner the other night. Like, to a restaurant, and there was a little boy there just staring at his iPad during the entire dinner WITH a headset, while the adult was staring at her phone. I had this super sad feeling come over me for a few minutes. So many people are there physically, but neglect the emotional needs of the people around us. Now, I don’t want to judge, because I promise, I’ve been there. And who knows? Maybe this kid is making all the monies being a YouTuber or Gamer or whatever the kids do these days.  I do not know the back story. I’m just trying to make a point. There was no conversation that I could see, as they were just in their own little worlds doing their own thing.

In my self-reflection, I’ve been really making a concerted effort to be present in my time with the people I care about. It’s so easy to grab a phone and scroll. It’s so easy to be distracted. I even yell at myself, “put the f@cking phone down.” They are such time sucks sometimes and if we’re not careful, they can inhibit us from FULLY engaging in our relationships, which can impact the dynamics in a not so great way. That’s not the person I want to be.

When we show up for people, we really need to show up. When we have things we need to do, we really need to show up. When we are creating, we need to SHOW UP. Scrolling is just another form of procrastination from all the good we could be building, whether that’s in our relationships or our personal goals.

This weekend, I encourage you (and I’ll do the same), to be super conscious of this. I will allow myself to be fully present and engaged in not only my life, but the lives of those I care about.

All my love, 

Lindsay M

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