Happy Friday!
It's been a week, I tell ya! (I feel like I say that by Tuesday every week. It's part of my charm. 😅)
But truly - it has been an incredible one. External situations aside, I made it a point to prioritize my time, my clients, and my learning. And sometimes my learning comes from unexpected places - like television.
The new season of Euphoria is coming out soon, and like any devoted show-watcher, I rewatch previous seasons before a new one drops. There's something about great writing that reveals uncomfortable truths about human behavior.
In season two, Lexi is putting on a play. She worries that it might hurt people's feelings. Fez - her semi-new crush - tells her:
“Sometimes, other people's feelings need to get hurt.”
That line stopped me. I had to pause the show because of its thoughtful impact. Because most people are so afraid of hurting someone else's feelings that they never say what needs to be said.
They stay quiet in relationships that aren't working.
They tolerate behavior that doesn't sit right.
They don't enforce boundaries that are being crossed.
They soften their truth so it's easier to digest.
They tolerate behavior that doesn't sit right.
They don't enforce boundaries that are being crossed.
They soften their truth so it's easier to digest.
I've done it too. So, no judgement here.
I've rehearsed a boundary in my head ten times before finally saying it out loud. I've typed a text and deleted it five times because I didn't want to “cause drama.” I've convinced myself that staying silent was maturity - when really, it was fear.
And sometimes boats need to be rocked.
Sometimes self-worth looks like saying:
“This doesn't work for me.”
“That hurt.”
“I need more.”
“No.”
And yes, someone might feel uncomfortable.
But protecting someone else's temporary discomfort at the expense of your long-term self-respect is not kindness. It's self-abandonment.
This was one of the most painful lessons I had to learn - and it's a major thread in my book, The Girl Who Cried Love. For years, I was chasing love while quietly betraying myself. I confused keeping the peace with keeping connection. I thought being understanding meant tolerating misalignment.
It doesn't.
If you're in a situation that isn't changing and you're too afraid to have the conversation, that's information.
If someone keeps crossing your boundaries and you keep adjusting instead of addressing it, that's information.
If you're waiting for someone else to dictate the direction of your life, that's information.
Life is too short to sit on the sidelines hoping someone else makes the right move.
You are the director here.
And sometimes being the director means calling “cut” when a scene isn't working.
Not because you want to hurt someone.
But because you respect yourself too much to keep pretending everything is fine.
As I prepare for our upcoming tour and step into a very full season, I'm being intentional about where my energy goes. Right now, that looks like working deeply with individual clients who are ready to stop negotiating their standards and start speaking up for their lives.
If this resonates with you - if you know there's a conversation you've been avoiding - maybe that's your starting point.
Not to attack.
Not to explode.
But to honor yourself.
Not to explode.
But to honor yourself.
Because self-worth isn't loud. But it is clear.
I love you,
Lindsay M.
2 comments
Hi Lindsay!! I met you in NYC a couple years ago!! I gave you an Ank necklace.. I only give them to people I want in Eternity!! You carry a bright light!! God Bless You!!
This might be the most important lesson you ever imparted with me as a life coach. I’m forever grateful for you and your guidance.